5.24.2007

The count


Not the Sesame Street count, the count to TA. Where do you begin the count? For the first time I'm a bit confused on where I should be counting from. Do I count from the day we got our LOA? Do I count from the day I know it went out?
I'm in bit of a panic.....for the first time in our adoption history I don't know....I don't know where to count from. How will I know the true number of days of pure agony I will be exerting for my sweet little Ellie?
The count has always been so important. I think more so with adoption then with my pregnancy. With pregnancy, I had a due date, November 3rd.....we passed that right up and went on to be induced on the 11th and for shits and giggles Braydon hung on. 3 bag of patosin(spelling), 1 ammio transfusion and a worthless epidural later he decided 2:05 AM on the 12th would be a better time.
Adoption count is so different, the window of possibilities is so much greater...2 to 5 weeks here, 3 to 5 months here, those are some big gaps of time. I can't even imagine for those waiting 24 months for a referral....I would have to be heavily medicated the entire time. My hat is off to those families.
What will I count when this journey is over? This is really the last one, I'm going to have to train myself to not want to count anymore........3, 3, sweet little darlings to love, Ah Ha Ha Ha Ha...